Life is beautiful and sometimes it is really hard, but life is beautiful!

Aunt Mary passed away early this morning, I do believe that my prayers were answered. I knew that I could not change her fate, so I prayed she have a peaceful pain free death. At least it seemed that way to me, she went into a coma a week and a half ago. She truly seemed to be resting peacefully thru the entire time, she really did not seem to be there anymore to me. Each time I visited her she seemed more like she had already left us and that last time, she tried to open her eyes to look at me but was unable to. So with a sad heart I said good bye, my hope now is that she is in heaven with God and our family that left before us! The services will be sometime this week.
Today was Tom's Aunt Jos 86th Birthday! It is strange to me that she has her 86th birthday, on the day my Aunt dies. For the last three years of my visits with Aunt Jo she tells me each time, sometimes several times that she wished she was dead. Even asks why God doesn't want her. It proves we have no controll of our final death. So anyway we stoped in the AM to give her medication to her. She has dementia and if she does not get her pills her memory gets very bad, soemtimes even dangerous. When we were there we said we would be back later for supper, reminding her not to eat til we get there.
We left on Laura's special outing and a few errands. We have been encouraging Laura to start going out on outings at day program. Every year the entire winter she refuses to go on outing with them. Every spring we start to encourage her to go out more often, the goal is twice a week. So for two weeks now she has had a special outing for being a very good girl. That is what Laura says! We ran to get propane for the RV, then made a stop at the RV store to get a filter and then Olive Garden for lunch. She ate very well and had chocolate cake for dessert. Laura and I then went home and baked cookies for dinner at Karen and Jims tommorow while we waited for her Mommie and Scott to come for there weekly dinner visit. Once they got here Tom and I went and got dinner for Aunt Jo and a cake. While we visited her I hemmed the pants I bought her. This weeks chore at Aunt Jos was to clean out her torn, stained burned clothes and replace them with new ones. I bought her 4 pairs of pants with two mathcing shirts and a matching jacket for each set, she was actually pleased. Everytime we do something for her we expect her to get upset but she now seems to like our help. It is almost as if a big part of her dementia is fueled by stress, as soon as she gets anxious about something the dementia becomes more intense and it takes sometime for her to return to her normal self. Today we visited for sometime while I hemmed her pants, she was alost totally normal the entire time with no confusion. It was actually a nice visit and she was appreciative for the clothing and the visit. I left there with a smile.
We were not home long before Laura came home, the usual hour with Tammy and Scott invading our house and my wishing that they leave soon so I can relax and unwind from a busy somewhat stressful day! It seems weird that I am not terrably upset about Aunt Mary's passing away but the truth is I know for sure she is now in a better place, no more pain! I invision she is sitting at the table with her husband, parents, cousins, aunts uncles and Jesus at the head of the table breaking the bread and dipping it into the sauce, yum that is what Jesus says! Sound good to you, wait til you join them, they will all be laughing and eatng some of Aunt Antoinette's pastries coffee and anisette! Memories that is what we have, my cildhood was unique! We all grew up on the same street. We were on the corner, my grandparents behind us, up the street was Uncle Patsy and through the woods was Aunt Mary & Uncle Jim and my cousins! The entire neighborhood seemed to be Italian or Polish and they all had something to offer from there gardens to share with a neighbor. Fruit, and veggies, homemade breads, pizza, jelly, sauce etc. That is why I invision them sitting at the table with Jesus having dinner, it is how I grew up being together, meant having a meal or a snack! So someday I will join them and wait for those left behind! See you soon Aunt Mary!